Saturday, August 30, 2008

its gudbye 4 real.. kyuem...

So I went 4 d cp nite on d 29th of august.. n ive had tis feeling since I came ere… tis is gonna b d last time I will b entering d college… tis time its real. A true farewell 2 d college but not those in d college I spose.. 4 me 2 come over 2 kyuem after tis is, I dun hv a solid reason 2 stay overnight again… I mean it wouldn’t b fun 2 juz hang out a day n go home by dark.. so yeah… guess its better meetin outside…

Met various peepz back ere… sum of them said hi normally at first n then when they realized its me they go like ‘EH!!’ n ill b smiling away again n I tink ive answerd d same q over n over again… hw is taylors n things like tat.. not 4gettin which is better.. kyuem or taylorz… ill make it clear ere again, ill always go 4 kyuem coz of d environment n activites n community but nw im in taylors n I gotta study hard 2 achieve my dreams… let kyuem b my inspiration 2 move 4ward. Let kyuem b d base of my dreams n taylors d place 4 me 2 jump higher. Sumtin like tat.. if u dun have a strong foundation, it is almost impossible 4 u 2 move forward….

At d end of d nite, I njoyd d cp! N yeah, wondered wat will I b doin if im stil there.. not sumtin I recommend u 2 do if ur missing tat place but well, it gave me smiles instead of tears.. I cn imagine myself doin sum crappy stuff n things like tat n panicking as well.. =) there were quite a crowd, even d seniors joind us watching.. batch 11 is kinda cool.. n yeah, sempat amik gambar ngan najib, faye n azri lagi kat depan hall… sesi camwhoring… hihihi

I went bck n started studydin again (yeah…sat sake…) till 1230 or sumtin like tat… n then I went 2 bed n woke up at 645.. gosh tatz late, rite.. but I was kinda exhausted… I hv no idea y.. not 2 say I was active or anytin tat nite mayb coz I used my feelings n brains excessively… (did i??) but I did manage 2 finish a sat test… n I tink when I get bck 2 my apartment, im gonna grab my other sat book… finish both books up! Its important!!

Im typing tis in college but I am goin 2 post tis at nite I tink.. when I get internet access again… its 1106am n I juz came bck frm d café.. been stayin there since 816 n got my bfast and study there… (again) I was glad I came back.. I found d part of me n yet im leavin it behind again but tis time im leaving it wif a smile on my face.. im glad I met u guys again… I truly am glad (xcept x dpt jumpe kak maji…) but there is a slight frustration in my tiny lil heart..n tis have been pondering in my mind since after cp.. n it will not fade away till I do sumtin… sumtin about it… but I dun hv d heart to coz it mite cause pain ( I dun mind if d pain is mine) and well… yeah, pain is not sumtin gud esp when u gotta gv ur full concentration 2 sumtin… I noe hw does it feels 2 b distracted frm doin sumtin important n hw guilty u feel after tat… so im stil tinkin whether 2 do or not 2 do…

I have verbal class frm 2 – 5… oh yeah, tnx boys 4 sittin wif me at d café juz now… lepak2 while asking bout me =) n sat n adp n d stuff bout studies.. hihi.. .lame sangat blaja my brain almost dried up… so now im waiting 4 my mum n bro 2 pick me up… I hope wat im feeling now will last 4eva inclusive of d frustration im feeling… coz it makes me feel incomplete n motivates me 2 find a way 2 complete tis feeling… so im goin home 4 gud frm kyuem… jauh d mata dekat di ati… friendships do last 4eva if u wish 4 it 2 last… if u reach your hands out n hold on tight to them… memories do last 4eva if u wish it 2 last.. if u teach urself 2 learn n 2 seek joy in them… feelings of luv do last 4eva if u wish it 2 lat… if u make it inspire u 2 move 4ward n 2 always give it a chance 2 bloom… dun face ur back against ur own true feelings, though it hurts, embrace it n b proud of it.. express it n ull b juz fine… trust me! ;P


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